-----Original Message-----
From: AJ Johnson [mailto:ajjohns@uiuc.edu]
Sent: Thursday, November 12, 1998 12:48 AM
Subject: Doughts uh de past
'Sup, dude. De Gobble Gobble Bowl gots'ta be held Danksgivin' Day, Dursday, Novemba' 26, 1998, at 10 o'clock in de mo'nin'. Dat be 14 days fum now. Slap mah' fro'! De game be at da damn homeyly confines uh de STC footba' practice fields and yo' presence be not only requested but failure t'attend gots'ta be snatchn as an insult. Sheeeiit. Unacceptable 'suses* gots'ta not be tolerated. Acceptable 'suses** aint allowed eider. Do not fo'get; ah' know where ya' live. 'S coo', bruh.
AJ
http://www.ews.uiuc.edu/~ajjohns/bowlgame.html
* Unacceptable 'suses include but aint limited to, dig dis: ah' must wuzh mah' fro, ah' must do plantationwo'k, mah' dog died, ah' gots' some final on monday, i'm some honky chick, ah' gots' some hangover, i'm still in durham, ah' must do laundry, ah' gots' no cleats, i'll mosey on down but won't play, i'm some slo' mo' fo', ah' can't catch, i'm homosexual, i'm bisexual, i'm transsexual, i'm straight, i'll git made fun of, ah' to'e mah' acl, i'll still be in farm until june, i'm too baaaad fo' ya', i'm not baaaad enough fo' ya', i'll be at some concert, i'm dirty, i'm clean, ah' can't run, ah' can't crawl, ah' can't boogie, ah' can't shimmy, ah' can't mosey, ah' can't skedaddle, ah' can't dance, ah' actually rememba' de email dat aj sent two and some half years ago fum which dis wuz translated, ah' cried when ah' read aj's oda' email fum two and some half years ago about losin' homeys, ah' dun didn't realize dat aj wuz jokin' when he wrote dat damn email about losin' homeys, ah' dink aj cried when he dought about losin' homeys, ah' dink aj cried in his bea' when he dought about losin' homeys, ah' dink aj's some sap, ah' can't recon' aj had some beer, i'm an engineer, i'm in las, i'm an enginea' but ah' wish ah' were in las, i'm in las but wish ah' were an engineer, i'm in las and dank god dat i'm not an engineer, mah' clunker stopped wo'kin' an ah' neva' gots dis email, i'll be shoppin', i'll be goin' t'de badroom, ah' duzn't gots' time, ah' gots too much time, my dojigger be Nicole, i'm on some mission fum god, ah' duzn't recon' in god, justin neva' drows me da damn ball, or mom says ah' can't play on danksgivin'. What it is, Mama!
** Acceptable 'suses are, dig dis: